Welcome to the twisted world of Jekyl. A barfbag full of stories some news worthy some not. mixed with a dash of occasional rhetoric and the useless editorial bantor of a mad man. sometimes fact, sometimes fiction, always entertaining.
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Jekyl’s World - The Olympics

The 2002 Winter Olympics just ended and the Jekylmeister has a few thoughts on the events. The drug disqualifications – including gold medal forfeitures -, judging discrepancies, Cold War pull-out tactics, and 50 something year old KISS members performing at the closing ceremonies all contributed in making these games a memorable experience.

What really struck a chord with some of us, though, is what I’ll categorically refer to as; questionable sports. I am still not convinced that snowboarding deserves Olympic status, but as some of these games go, it’s not that bad. Ice Dancing is suspect, as well. There are some goofy games in the mix.

There have been many commentaries made simply trying to figure out what the sport of Curling is all about. I am somewhat of an expert, having spent 15 minutes on the phone with my sister having it explained to me. Even after gaining an understanding of what they’re doing, I still am not sure I ‘get’ the game. You slide this tea-pot looking thing across the ice, while people sweep brooms in front of it to make it go where it needs to go, which is in the middle of a couple of circles that look kind of like a target. What exactly is that thing? Apparently, you can knock the other person’s tea-pot out of the circle and score better if the sweepers are doing their job well. I don’t understand the need for the sweepers, though. Why can’t they just rely on the accuracy of the Curler?

This game reminds me a lot of my favorite bar room pastime: Shuffleboard. It’s the same principle, just played on a table-top bowling lane instead of ice. Why not make this an Olympic event? I can hear the announcer now: “Seventy Four year old Al Weinstein of Miami Beach is representing the American team in its quest for the Gold medal. This is his 17th Olympics and he’s in fine form.” Geez. Why not bowling? Or Darts?

I invented a game that would bring out the artistic quality in all who partake which would be called “Snow Caligraphy”. It would involve writing poetic verses, drawing nationalistic logos, or just artsy-fartsy kind of stuff with one’s pee in snow banks. There could be a number of cool angles on this sport, like drinking weird stuff to make neat colors and the women’s event would really be something to see. Come to think of it, why stop at pee? How about lactating caligraphers? Now, that would pull in the TV viewers! Anyway, I’m happy that we got through the whole thing without any bombings or other ugly business. By the next Winter Olympics they’ll have some new games for us to criticize.

Until Then,

CHEERS Jekyl